Friday, June 19, 2009

Help i'm alive

This weekend is going to be the worst. This week ended the worst. I want to rid alot of people from my mind and thoughts and memories now. I don't want much now, only to see you without having to lie about everything to the people I should never have to lie to. I just want to see you and pretend to snap a photo of you underneath the moon so it can be stored in my thoughts chamber for many days, weeks, months, years to come. You are there and I am here. Why can't you be there and I be there? Or I be here and you be here. Bugger. That's what it is. Bugger. Tomorrow is Saturday, nothing will happen tomorrow. Nothing at all. Not one thing. Actually, everything will happen. Every single possible thing you can think of will happen, yes I know you have an amazing imagination. It will happen. Just not here, not here with me, where I go, who i'm with, in my house, in my dogs house, in the house next door. It will happen somewhere else, another town, city, another country, another planet, another time it will happen. If it doesn't happen it will still happen! It will happen in your mind and your thoughts and you will wonder what you would do if it were to be true. I want to dive into a pool of rocks, and all those that come after that. I wat to say so many things, say what I feel but I can not word out. Instead I speak as I normally would, and everything would be received in a reverent hush. Help, I'm Alive.

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